50 ways to annoy people on your plane (:

1. Spread out, Proceed to start a peanut war [or whatever crisp like food is going]

2. If flying through the night, wait until most of the people in your area are asleep, then yell as loud as you possibly can;
" Sliced bread is sliced, WE DIDN'T LOCK THE FRONT DOOR!"

3. Click the same film as a person near you, fast forward yours, find out the ending, start to make conversation with them... then tell them the ending to their film.

4. Wait until somebody near you goes to the toilet, fast forward their film then act oblivious when they get back.

5. Shout "SNAKES ON A PLANE!" and throw rubber snakes at passengers.

6. Cry. Loudly.

7. Quite simply; "Are we there yet?"

8. Quite simply; "I need a wee!"

9. Put your ipod on quiet but sing aloud.

10. Unplug your earphones so they aren't in anything, proceed to make your own song up, when passengers try and silence you, declare [loudly] that you cannot hear them.

11. Practice hymns with the people you are flying with, make the people surrounding you join in. If they don't become blasphemous.

12. Get a pillow with a hole in it, occasionally squeeze the feathers out of it then eventually ask a steward/ess where the feathers are coming from.

13. Write a book of annoying things to do, discuss this loudly on a plane.

14. Hum loudly, then yell that there's a bee on the plane, then declare that you are severely allergic to beestings.

15. Put your makeup on, then spray the person next to you with your perfume/ cologne.

16. Make whoever is next to you hold your mirror, then refuse to take it back.

17. Spill all of your makeup on the person next to you.

18. Get a sick bag and continually pretend to be sick.

19. Make the nearest passenger to you take a picture, tell them it's not good enough and make them retake it again and again..

20. Sit far away from the aisle, keep getting up from your seat; making sure you disturb all those around you. After about the 20th time of visiting the toilet say: "Sorry, I suffer from incontinence. I just CANNOT control my bowels!"

21. Take a whoopee cushion.

22. Take a recorder in your hand luggage, practice during the flight.

23. Start a band with the people you are flying with, using the afore mentioned recorder, also a harmonica, someone must whistle, another must hum.. use your imaginations.

24. Start a gospel choir.

25. Fashion a long cloak from the inflight blankets, state that you are the master of the aircraft and that everyone must speak your language [E.g. Parcel tongue if you choose to be Voldemort.. you could also incorporate number 5- snakes on a plane]

26. Trip people as they walk past you, then pretend to be asleep or engrossed in a film. Alternatively, stare/glare at them.

27. At the beginning of the flight, stand with the greeting stewardess, then point the passengers in completely the wrong direction.

28. Pretend to be a sat nav, and say " Make U turn where possible" or, record a sat nav saying 'Make a U turn where possible' Set the recording off at random intervals.

29. Refuse to sit on the 13th row of the aeroplane. Have a fullblown tantrum or panic attack.

30. Pretend to have an allergic reaction then say... " Don't worry folks, it was only wind."

31. Demand to see the black box.

32. Pretend to be insane, using whoever you're flying with as your carer.

33. During turbulance scream and pretend to have a panic attack.

34. Yell "WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE" whenever the seatbelt sign appears.

35. Pretend to be a fairy and sprinkle glitter everywhere, say random things like " We're flying on the wings of unicorns you know."

36. Bless passengers by hitting them with a stick. [Not recommended]

37. Set up a face paint stall and paint terrorist masks on everyone.

38. Wrap yourself in a body bag and lie completely still.

39. Take a fat person on a flight with you, get them to squish whoever they sit next to.

40. Demand caviar and lobster at all opportunites.

41. Have an inflight picnic, all over the passenger next to you's tray table. When they try and move it say " EXCUUUUSE ME!"

42. Tell the person next to you that they are wearing the colour of the devil, and that if you speak to satan now they will die immediately.

43. Have a party on the plane, make lots of noise and sing happy birthday.

44. Learn the language of the country you are visiting, then discuss the pronounciation of the native swear words loudly.

45. Panic at irregular intervals, for example; "DID I PACK MY HAT?!...... Yeah, I did."
............ "DID I PACK SUNTAN LOTION? .... Yeah...NO!....... Yeah I did". Reassure those around you that you have indeed packed the items mentioned.

46. Pretend the flight is a rollercoaster when the seatbelt light is lit, engage in the 'Hands up contest', scream, shout and generally have a good time. When the seatbelt light goes out, get out of your seat and say with a satisfied look... " Well that was fun."

47. Watch a scary film, scream regularly and produce some popcorn from your hand luggage, jump at a scary point and throw your popcorn everywhere.

48. Sing the same song over and over preferably a rude song [Bad Touch for example], alternatively, watch the same film and recite the words.
49. Dance when the seatbelt light is off, e.g the cancan in the aisle, the stripper [Stick your bare leg out of the toilet cubicle and get the people you are flying with to cheer and throw monopoly money].

50. Mouth a conversation with the nearest person to you who has their headphones on, when they remove their headphones; probably in annoyance, say " Ugh, it doesn't matter anymore."