*Poem* Running From The Past

How do you tell someone you're feeling lost when you don't even know why?
Things are always changing within the blink of an eye.
They say everything will work out perfectly fine,
I continue to work harder to better this silly life of mine,
But I think it's safe to say that I still don't feel alright.
I try to block the pain out and live on but I can't shake this feeling of how I don't belong.
Decisions are based off of regrets and it's time to make you feel as if we've never met.

I try to hold myself together,
"What's so wrong?"
"Oh, just feeling a little under the weather.."
The storms' trying to get ahead of her.
The future is still a blur,
Cause for an addiction, there's still no cure.
Addictive love or even addictive drugs,
Even when she's healed, she craves for it like one last delicious meal.
No matter how they help, she still feels unloved.

Falling underground when I can't even make out a sound,
Who still wants me around?
I'm feeling so lost even though I've already been found.
My unspoken thoughts scream out loud.
The thunder shouts at me like lightning striking down from the clouds.

Although heaven is still a mystery,
I feel I'm already there when he's kissing me.
He says he loves me if he didn't he wouldn't be seeing me.
Unspoken dreams are falling apart by the seams.
It's not always as bad as it seems.
But still I can't help this daydream where everything is exactly what it's supposed to be.
After all I've done, why would anyone still believe in me?
In reality,
I'm still curious about how they felt about me.
I could mess up your head without even trying,
I'm telling the truth although you think I'm lying.
Hate me today from the heartache I've caused yesterday.
Soon enough, I'll run far far away and never look back to this day.
When I cross your thoughts, just remember it's for the best b/c I wanted it this way.
I never wanted to hurt you back in the day,
I can't change what has happened but I can be sure we'll never cross paths again.

Running from the life that awaits ahead of me,
I don't want to hurt anymore.. Can't you see?
I won't cause anymore pain that's the reason I'm going away..

March 28th, 2015 - Hope Workman