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JakeAnnalea

Activity Log

I love him more than you could imagine

28th Jul 2010 00:57

14 years, 4 months & 3 days ago

My words

22nd Apr 2010 12:54

14 years, 7 months & 7 days ago

......

20th Apr 2010 18:51

14 years, 7 months & 9 days ago

We had some memories

2nd Feb 2010 14:06

14 years, 9 months & 25 days ago

JakeAnnalea 24 Comments

We had some memories

14 years, 9 months & 25 days ago

2nd Feb 2010 14:06

I once had a friend.He moved away.

I remember swinging on the tire swing with him in kindergarten.

We had some memories.

I remember the day his daddy beat him,he told me.
We got through it together.

We had some memories.

I remember the day we swam in the creek,splashing around.

We had some memories.

I remember when you didnt come to school that day.

I had some memories.

I remember the day turned into a week,and you finally showed.
You were bruised and hurting.

We had some memories.

I remember your funeral.I was crying.
Then I took a look at your short life with me.

I smiled and thought,we had some memories.

You moved to Heaven and someday I will be there with you.

JakeAnnalea

well majette,i know exactly how it feels.cancer claimed my Grandma Vina and my Aunt Jill in one year.Aunt Jill had a baby and a 4 year old.

14 years, 9 months & 23 days ago

4th Feb 2010 23:31

Sad. Oh, and although some people may not call it a poem, sometimes it just helps to get your thoughts down. I know that; I did it recently when my uncle died from cancer. http://www.marapets.com/topics.php?id=2318929&fid=30

14 years, 9 months & 23 days ago

4th Feb 2010 19:25

JakeAnnalea

this kid in the poem resembles all poor kids that get abused.

14 years, 9 months & 23 days ago

4th Feb 2010 12:09

I know you tried to put it in stanza's, but its more like this:
(SOMEWHAT like this)

I once had a friend.
He moved away.

I remember swinging on the tire swing with him in kindergarten.
We had some memories.

I remember the day his daddy beat him,he told me.
We got through it together.
We had some memories.

I remember the day we swam in the creek,splashing around.
We had some memories.

I remember when you didn't come to school that day.
I had some memories.

I remember the day turned into a week,and you finally showed.
You were bruised and hurting.
We had some memories.

I remember your funeral.
I was crying.
Then I took a look at your short life with me.
I smiled and thought,we had some memories.

You moved to Heaven and someday I will be there with you.

14 years, 9 months & 24 days ago

3rd Feb 2010 18:27

JakeAnnalea

i will try.

14 years, 9 months & 24 days ago

3rd Feb 2010 18:03

???The poem had no emotion to me.
???To much repeating of "we had some memories"
???Follow lilly's advice and make stanzas
-=-
True the poem had emotion, but you can feel it through thew words in a way.
The repeat of "We had some memories" is what made it a poem.
And yes, you should make it into stanza's, which shouldn't be a problem.

14 years, 9 months & 24 days ago

3rd Feb 2010 13:29